Welcome to Day 5 of the Perfect Blog Tour, with Kallypso Masters and friends!
Thank you, Herding Cats and Burning Soup for hosting me!
This six-day Perfect Blog Tour celebrates the release of Nobody's Perfect (Rescue Me #4), by Kallypso Masters, which released this week—FINALLY! Perfect continues the long-awaited Happily Ever After for probably the two most wounded characters in the series, Damian Orlando and Savannah Gentry (now Savi Baker). Their heartbreaking story began in Masters at Arms (a free read—see links below) and the couple reunited in Nobody's Hero after eight years apart.
Those who follow me on Facebook know that, as an incest and child sexual abuse survivor myself, this book was akin to opening a vein and pouring my lifeblood onto the page. I usually take 2-3 months to write and edit a book in this series (tops). This one took nearly eight months! The result is not an autobiographical story, but my fellow survivors will come face to face with a lot of the same triggers and aftermath we all suffer as a result of our abuse.
Many of the people who helped me get the BDSM, psychology, and other aspects of this story right also are survivors of abuse, or live the lifestyle and work with survivors using BDSM for healing. This Perfect Blog Tour kicks off with the personal reflections of Ekatarina "Saya" Sayanova, who served first as a subject expert (BDSM and medical expertise), then a beta reader, and finally an editor. While reading the whipping by catharsis scene you'll be reading over the course of Days 2-6 in this tour, she was drawn into the scene almost as if she were a participant—at one point, Damián, and then Patti, the bottom he is working with in the scene.
In this Excerpt blog tour, you will be reading from a single scene, Chapters 10-11 of the book. In this scene, Damián (sometimes called Damo) is called upon to be a Service Top to Patti, a slave/masochist at the Masters at Arms Club whose Master (Victor) isn't a sadist and is unable to give her the level of catharsis through whipping she needs to work through a severe trigger that shut her down emotionally earlier that day. This happens to be the first time in months that Damian has been in the club—and is the first time ever for Savi, who was invited here by Adam, who plays a role in helping Savi to understand the purpose of a cathartic whipping—and why Damian is the one to provide that.
~Kallypso Masters
Sept 17 ~ RomFan
Sept 18 ~ Salacious Reads
Sept 19 ~ Delighted Reader
Sept 20 ~ My Reading Obsession
Read the Excerpt after the jump!
EXCERPT #4
"Patti's coping mechanism of making herself numb has worked for her for a long time, but until Victor and Damián, she hadn't really been living—merely existing."
Savi understood that feeling too well. Her skin usually felt anesthetized, as if she had been injected with Novocain from the top of her head to the soles of her feet. That inability to feel was normal for her now. She'd become accustomed to it. Still, she hated that she couldn't feel the sensation of Mari hugging or kissing her. Savi wanted so desperately to feel her baby's arms around her, but…felt nothing but pressure. Of course, she would go through the motions and return the affection, but she'd always been left to wonder what it would feel like to—well, feel.
Is that what Damián was helping this woman to do?
Savi blinked her eyes to remove the unwelcome sting of unshed tears. She remained riveted to the spectacle across the room, knowing she wouldn't be able to leave until this scene played out. Patti now seemed to be riding some kind of high, moaning, even smiling.
Savi turned to Adam. "If I didn't know better, I'd say she was stoned."
Adam continued to stroke Karla's arm. Savi was mesmerized by the gentle way he touched her, wondering what it would feel like if a man touched her that way. She'd probably run screaming from the room, although Damián had touched her like that. She'd even enjoyed it.
Adam smiled. "Endorphins. She's getting closer now."
Endorphins. Like the ones released when Savi cut her arm all those times so long ago? She still remembered that euphoric feeling.
On the next stroke, Patti let out a cry of anguish and her body sagged against the post. Damián only struck harder the next time. She screamed again. Seconds later, tears began to stream down the woman's face.
"That's my good girl. Let it out." Damián's words made Savi cringe, but she tamped down the emotion.
Thwack! Thwack!
Patti screamed out, "I am not your whore!"
Savi's chest tightened and the walls began closing in on her.
"Let it go, Patticakes. That's my sweet girl." Victor's voice spoke to Patti in firm, soothing tones. She began to babble more about not being someone's whore, certain she wasn't referring to Victor, but some abuser from her past.
"You're my slut. Only Sir Victor's slut. No one else's."
Savi couldn't breathe.
"You okay, Savi?"
She turned to find Karla's look of concern aimed at her. Savi nodded automatically, then it occurred to her that Patti was the one in pain, yet Savi was receiving Karla's sympathy. This place was seriously fucked up.
She was seriously fucked up, because Savi found herself wishing Damián had called her his good girl. But she'd hated those words her entire life.
Damián had become silent since he'd spoken them, except for the swish and crack of the cat. Why didn't he stop? Couldn't he see Patti had zoned out? She didn't need any more pain—or whatever they wanted to call it.
No way would Savi ever let anyone abuse her like that.
But she had. Many times. And she'd enjoyed it, too.
Filthy whore. Dirty slut.
Only Patti didn't act as if she was being abused now. Her face was at peace. Bliss-filled. She had the look of a woman who'd surrendered herself totally into the hands of another. And not gentle hands, either. Patti had turned over the decisions about how hard to whip her to Damián; trusting him to give her what she needed, rather than self-medicating and keeping herself numb.
How did what Patti experienced now compare to the rush Savi had gotten from cutting herself? There was no comparison. When Savi had cut herself, she'd remained in control of how long, how deep.
No, she'd only had the illusion of control.
Cutting herself with a razor blade, she could have caused serious damage and not realized it until it was too late. Would she have cut herself if Damián hadn't found her last week?
No, she'd already laid the blade down, hadn't she? No matter, she'd stopped in time.
But having someone else in charge of delivering the relief she craved would be safer. She remembered what Damián had said soon after finding her on the bathroom floor.
"Would you like to find other ways to get that rush without cutting yourself?"
As she watched the cat slap against Patti's back again, Savi tamped down a momentary jealousy. Oh dear lord. Was she a masochist, too? Did she need what Patti was going through in order to feel something again? Had the sadists in her past conditioned her to crave severe pain in order to feel anything, sexual or otherwise?
Victor came over and placed a hand on Damián's shoulder and, without a word, the two of them went to the post. A woman came over from the bar and offered Damián a wet towel and, while Victor stroked Patti's head, Damián pressed the towel against her burning skin.
Luke brought over a tube of some kind of ointment and a pair of gloves and Damián began to administer first aid to the stripes he'd placed on her back.
Victor bent down and unstrapped Patti's ankles, while Damián freed her wrists. The gentle way they ministered to her made Savi's eyes burn and she blinked until the discomfort receded. Patti collapsed into Victor's arms and the linebacker of a man carried her to a loveseat where he wrapped her gently in a blanket and softly stroked her arm. Patti's eyes remained closed, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. Her blonde head lay against his brown chest, her face serene. Calm.
"They haven't spoken a word."
Adam said in a low voice, "Victor handles aftercare a lot better than the actual whipping. He knows she's still in catharsis. Talking now would pull her out too soon. She does need to know Victor is there for her, so he'll touch her, but he won't intrude until she's finished processing the emotions she's just released."
Savi continued to watch, mesmerized. This might not be therapy, but for Patti, it certainly was therapeutic. Damián had given her what she needed. This was the first time she'd ever heard about one Dom providing a service for some other Dom's sub. Of course, she'd been a pawn of Lyle's and her father's many times, passed around to service whichever clients were on the agenda. But none of those men had cared about her needs or taken care of her the way Damián and Victor were taking care of Patti. They weren't doing this to meet their own sexual or sadistic needs. It was all about Patti and having her emotional needs met.
After what seemed like an eternity to Savi, Patti's eyelids fluttered open and she looked up at Victor. Something he said brought a smile to her face. When he kissed her, Savi turned away, realizing for the first time she'd been intruding on a private moment.
In an instant, Savi had a flash of clarity. She wanted to be the one chained to that post.
She wanted Damián to use the cat—well, no, maybe just a whip—on her. Like Patti.
She glanced across the room and watched as Damián finished cleaning his whip. He must have taken care of the cat while she was mesmerized with Patti and Victor's decompression—no, aftercare, Adam had called it. Damián applied some kind of lotion to the leather, coiled it, and tucked it into his leather bag. He zipped the bag, picked it up, and then turned toward her.
Something knotted in the pit of her stomach.
Damián, I want to feel again.
Savi blinked rapidly, but her eyes continued to sting with unshed tears. A look of regret crossed Damián's face. He turned away from her and walked toward the door.
Thank God. What on earth was she thinking? She'd never be able to experience what Patti had tonight. She'd never even be able to get beyond being restrained again, much less take that level of pain.
She was beyond hope. Savi wished she could shed the tears stinging the backs of her eyelids.
"Breathe, Savi. Now." She blinked and found Adam face-to-face with her. "Damián can help you, too."
She shook her head, then wondered how he'd known what she'd been thinking. "No one can help me."
"Bullshit. Trust him."
"I can't trust anyone that much."
"What are you most afraid of?"
Savi drew another deep breath, prepared to give her pat answer that she wasn't afraid of anything. But she was. She couldn't lie to herself any longer. "Too many things to name."
"Name one."
"Restraints. I can't let anyone restrain me."
What did you think if that scene? Want more? You can finish up the scene at the last stop of the tour. Link is below.
Sept 22 ~ Guilty Indulgence
Savannah Gentry, now Savi Baker, escaped the torture and degradation forced upon her by a sadistic father for eleven years and has made a safe life for herself and her daughter. When her father threatens her peace of mind—and her daughter's safety—Savi runs to Damián Orlando for protection. Their one day together eight years earlier changed both their lives and resulted in a secret she can no longer hide. But being with Damián reawakens feelings she wants buried—and stirs up an onslaught of disturbing flashbacks that leave her shaken to the core with little hope of ever being a sexual being again.
Damián has his own dragons to fight, but has never forgotten the one perfect day he spent with Savannah in a cave at the beach. He will go to the ends of the earth to protect Savi and her daughter, but can never be the whole man she deserves after a firefight in Iraq. Besides, the trauma of war and resulting PTSD has led him to find his place as the Masters at Arms Club's favorite sadist. Savi needs someone gentle and loving, not the broken man he has become. But he sees that the lifestyle he's come to embrace also can help Savi regain control of her life and sexuality. How can he not help redirect her negative thoughts and actions if she needs him?
~~***~~~***~~
For those new to the Rescue Me series, the intensely emotional stories will have you laughing, crying, screaming, and experiencing a catharsis of your own as you read about these honorable, loveable, but quite imperfect characters who still manage to fumble toward ecstasy in the arms of their perfect mates.
The stories are told in chronological order and build upon past stories, so you'll readers are advised strongly to read the series in order. To help you enter their world and understand many of the main characters in the series (who will return in book after book), the introduction to the series, Masters at Arms, is a free (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Smashwords, All Romance eBooks, Kobo, iTunes, and other booksellers). Masters is followed by Nobody's Angel (#2), Nobody's Hero (#3), and Nobody's Perfect (#4). At least five more books are planned over the next few years, but no other publication dates have been set.
1. Kallypso is giving away a $10 Gift Certificate to one commenter at herding cats & burning soup! So leave her some love and don't forget to leave your email address so we can reach you! This one's open today (9/21) only!
2. One tour wide grand prize of a $200 Gift Certificate is also being offered by Kallypso. How amazing is that?! Fill out the form below to enter that giveaway!
OMG! This book sounds so awesome I can't wait to read it! I better wait until the weekend when I can devote my whole weekend to it! I may need some tissues! Kally thanks for such a moving excerpt! You are totally awesome!!
ReplyDeleteThanks! If you haven't read the others, you might be a little lots (I hate to rehash what's already in the other books.) The first one is free and this couple begins there, then reunite in another book, so it's best to read in order. I'd hate for you to wonder who all these characters who are part of "the family."
DeleteKally
This was just one of the hardest scenes for me to read. The emotions between Damian & Savi are so raw and powerful! Amazing book and series!
ReplyDeletemodularmates(at)comcast(dot)net
Isn't it amazing LM? I've had to take little breaks reading the different excerpts. Thanks for coming by! Hope you enjoy the book :)
DeleteWhat an awesome excerpt. I can't wait to read the whole book.
ReplyDeletewolphcall(at)bellsouth(dot)net
This is such an awesome book. I finished it two days ago and I haven't been able to pick up another book I am so wrung out! AWESOME!
ReplyDeleteOboyo...better and better! But, this book and allergies...not good...very messy, LOL!
ReplyDeletebarbbattaglia @ yahoo.com
OH OH! I haven't got to start the book yet but I am so excited to read it. Each time I have read the blogs I am just glued! I have a feeling this is going to be my favorite book! There is something about Damian and Savi that has always kept me right there with them! Kally you are amazing. Don't ever stop what you are doing!
ReplyDeleteWow, that was soooo intense! It was hard to read but I had to read it. Can't wait to see what happens with Damian and Savi. Thanks for the excerpt continuation.
ReplyDeletee.balinski(at)att(dot)net
I am so looking forward to reading this book...each excerpt gets more and more intense.
ReplyDeletesusanmplatt AT hotmail dot com
I'm halfway through with Nobody's Perfect and absolutely love it. I knew I would since I loved all of the others in the series. Now I have to wait for the next book.
ReplyDeletekesummer69 at gmail dot com
As I said before excellent series...awesome book...in one word INTENSE....
ReplyDeleteprincesa.boricua@hotmail.com
Love the excerpt! Thank you for the giveaway!
ReplyDeleteverusbognar (at) gmail (dot) com
Awesome excerpt. This series is new to me. Thanks for the giveaway.
ReplyDeleteSue B
katsrus(at)gmail(dot)com
The first book is free (Masters at Arms) and is the introduction--so if you want to see if you like the characters and writing, that's the place to start! But the story is a continuation from book to book (not one-couple standalones), so the main characters from Masters at Arms show up in significant ways in all of the books.
DeleteHope you enjoy them!
Kally
I have already read the first two books in this series. I will definitely be grabbing Damian and Savi's book. They both deserve a HEA more than anyone else.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!
slinkydennis@yahoo.com
Love this and can´t wait to read more, =)
ReplyDeletebest wishes & Happy Friday!
//Linda
fr_larsson at hotmail dot com
Thanks for participating in Kally's hop. Love the new book. kim
ReplyDeletestarsia_70@yahoo.com
I finished this book last night and I loved it. Thank you for the gift of your imagination and heart.
ReplyDeleteamberdcline gmail com
I wholeheartedly recommend this book to everyone. Kally is an amazing writer.
ReplyDeletermwyer at shaw dot ca
I just read the book on Monday, and I already find myself rereading scenes. This is definitely a book that stays in your thoughts.
ReplyDeletekatefrishman gmail com
I love when I find books like that Kate! Can't wait to get caught up in the series and read this one :) Thanks for coming by :)
DeleteI can't wait to get to this book. This excerpt is amazing!
ReplyDelete~Summer
summer_rose10@yahoo.com
Great excerpt! Thanks for sharing! ;) Love your books! Keep them a coming! ;)
ReplyDeleteshadowluvs2read(at)gmail(dot)com
This is the most intense, heartrending, and ultimately beautiful books I've read in a very, very long time. Thanks so much!
ReplyDeleteI'm closing my eyes and not reading any parts of the book until tomorrow when I can send the kids outside and enjoy it in peace and quiet.
ReplyDeleteI love this series and can't wait to read this one.
Heather E
Hregtvedt@aol.com
I'm closing my eyes and not reading any parts of the book until tomorrow when I can send the kids outside and enjoy it in peace and quiet.
ReplyDeleteI love this series and can't wait to read this one.
Heather E
Hregtvedt@aol.com
I haven't been reading any of the excerpts, I am waiting for the book. I don't like reading ahead and knowing anything ahead of time but it's been very hard these past few days to not give in a read a sentence here and there! I love love love this series :)
ReplyDeletekitcat76(at)hotmail(dot)com
You're a strong woman Cathy. I caved in at nearly the beginning and read the excerpts :) Glad you love the series too!
DeleteGood girl! And this is from Chapters 10-11--so there's lots that happens before this as they slowly build trust. I wasn't going to rush Savi--and neither did Damian. He's so patient with her. :)
DeleteKally
Kally that scene was beautiful And heartbreaking! Congratulations on writing such a fantastic series!
ReplyDeleteredfirewood888(at)yahoo(dot)ca
This book sounds really good!! Thanks for the awesome post and giveaway!
ReplyDeleteehaney578 at aol dot com
I am just skimming these excerpts because I am currently reading the book, but only on Chapter 4 and cannot bring myself to read ahead. This is one of my favorite series! I think she brings the characters to life with her words and makes me think of them as real people who I have come to care about. Love it!!
ReplyDeleteCongrats again on the release! :)
trb0917 at gmail.com
It's so tempting to read them isn't it? I've been really impressed with writing as well. Enjoy the rest of the book Tina!
DeleteThanks. I have to keep putting it down because of a mix between it being extremely emotional and the family needing things. :)
DeleteReading their story in MAA was so gut wretching, I can't wait to see how they help each other!
ReplyDeletelfacchini(at)tampabay(dot)rr(dot)com
I'm skipping the excerpts too since I'm planning to read the book tomorrow. Can't wait...
ReplyDeleteSebrinah68@gmail.com
lol. I finally caved and read them. They're so good! Enjoy your day of reading tomorrow! Hope you love it :)
DeleteI'm planning on starting this book tomorrow while hanging out at a car show all day. I'm more excited about reading Nobody's Perfect then the car show and I have a car in it!
ReplyDeletesuz2(at)cox(dot)net
Have fun at the car show Susan and enjoy the read! Fabulous book and beautiful cars? Sounds like a great combo to me :)
DeleteI have heard so many different reviews on this and it is on my TBR list.
ReplyDeleteIt looks like this one is going to need to be bumped up to get it...
Thanks for Sharing Beckey
BeckeyWhiteATgmailDOTcom
Great excerpts so far. Love the cover. Adding it to my wishlist.
ReplyDeletemythic021@gmail.com
The first book in the series (where this couple meets--Section Two) is FREE! Please start there. The story won't make as much sense without seeing where they've been. They also reunite in Nobody's Hero (#3).
DeleteI write in soap opera style. :)
Kally
Awesome excerpt! Can't wait to read it :)
ReplyDeleteLacey T
laceyblossom1(at)gmail(dot)com
I LOVE Kally's books!! I am reading this one right now, even recommended it to my doctor's receptionist this morning because she was talking about 50 Shades and wanting more books to read, lol. I told her I had not read those books, but that I knew some GREAT authors of BDSM books and made her a short list, including Kally. Even told her that was what I was reading now.
ReplyDeleteJune
manning_j2004 at yahoo dot com
Thanks for pimping me out, June! Glad you're enjoying it!
DeleteKally
This is amazing! Can't wait to download the first story!
ReplyDeleterfg dot wwe at gmail com
My sister has been raving about these books. I can't wait to start them. I've heard great things! Thanks so much!
ReplyDeletehschrock24112 at yahoo dot com
The excerpts have been great! I haven't read any of this series yet. But I'm hearing such great things about Kallypso's books. I can't wait to start this series.
ReplyDeleteluvfuzzzeeefaces at yahoo dot com
Sounds great, can't wait to read it!
ReplyDeletetiger-chick-1(at)hotmail(dot)com
I read Masters at Arms and Savannah and Damain's story is the one I didn't want to end. I'm now reading Nobody's Hero. Can't wait to start reading Nobody's Perfect.
ReplyDeletebeckerjo at verizon dot net
I can hardly wait to read this book. I read the others and loved them. However I have things that need to get done first and I know that if I buy the book now, those things will NOT get done. I am hoping Tuesday will be download onto my kindle day so I can curl up and read, read, read.
ReplyDeleteI'm actually going to upload a cleaner version of it in a few days--but my grandson wants to be born today, I think, so the revisions are on the back burner. (But her was Gramma's Good Boy to wait for me to get the first version out of MY baby, anyway! I'm always putting out revisions, though. I hate finding typos and fixing problems.
DeleteOh! My son just told me she's at 4 cm! "We're having a baby!" Gramma's been called in--so gotta run!
Kally
Reading it now.....so good. Congrats Kally!!!!
ReplyDeletebreeziedlee@gmail.com
wow this excerpt is so good. I can't wait to read how Damien helps Savi. This series is awesome. lol I get to start reading my copy on Saturday. :-) Thanks for the giveaway.
ReplyDeleteshellya121(at)yahoo(dot)com
Love all the rescue e series especially nobody's hero my favorite, master Adam yummy! Naneemcgee@aol.com
ReplyDeleteVery emotional excerpt.... Can't wait to read...kallys writing is very emotional...draws you in to each characters lives ...naneemcgee@aol.com
ReplyDeleteKally, you did a beautiful job conveying Savi's experience seeing Patty receive what she needed. I finished the book and want to read it again. I read it to fast.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for this giveaway. The books sounds amazing.
ReplyDeletetinyauthor at yahoo dot com
Love this and can´t wait for more! =)
ReplyDeletebest wishes, Linda
I have the first two books in this series, I really have to read them because #4 sounds great.
ReplyDelete