Thursday, June 16, 2016

1 star-- The Billionaire’s Favorite Mistake (Billionaires and Bridesmaids #4) by Jessica Clare

Well, that did not go well. At all. Pretty much the only thing I enjoyed about The Billionaire's Favorite Mistake was the "Billionaire" and even he was questionable. Typically I love Clare's writing and have had a blast with this series and the one it's connected to. The Billionaire's Favorite Mistake and I, however, did not get along. There will be spoilers. Because I'm annoyed. And long. Because I'm annoyed even 12 hours after finishing. Sorry.

Alright so the gist is that Greer has loved her buddy Asher for pretty much ever but he's never seen her as more than a friend and she's ready to make him finally notice her. So she's gonna tart herself up and come on to him at a party and win his heart. Instead she gets bad drunk sex, winds up pregnant and pulls a runner and never talk to him again. Plans are of course foiled when he finds out and wants to win her back.

I just had so many problems with this one... We started out on a wrong foot when the heroine sexified herself and decided to go to a party blind (couldn't see 3 feet in front of herself) instead of wearing her glasses because she wanted to be sexy and get Asher to notice her. And right there I'm already going eh because, really?

Next up was a hero who was so drunk he was slurring his words and the heroine having sex with him in the gardens at the party despite being a virgin and again him being so drunk he was practically useless.

Bad quickie sex ensued and of course no condom because of aforementioned sloppy drunkedness and her feelings being so hurt that she's never going to talk to him ever again because he was a bad lay and didn't treat her how she thought he should or use a condom. Again. The dude was beyond drunk. There was no business having sex at all. And utter ridiculousness at throwing away like a decade of friendship and a relationship that meant everything to you because it didn't go as planned? Really? But yes now he's absolute scum and a horrible human being and on and on.

Oh and she slapped him because she was upset. Yall know I love when a heroine resorts to violence like that.

Moving on, though. The blurb claims she was tossed aside. No. She did the tossing. Refused to talk to him. Found out weeks later she was pregnant and decided she wasn't gonna tell him about that either. It was her baby (no, no it's NOT just your baby) and fuck him.

Basically at this point I've got no use for the heroine at all. The hero though? He wasn't half bad. He'd been at a horrible low in his life when they hooked up but it was a wake up call for him and he changed his life around. Stopped drinking, cut back on work responsibilities, tried to make it up to her, etc. I didn't totally love him and some of his soon to be actions but at least he wasn't all bad.

So his plan to get her to finally talk to him was to blackmail her absentee father--think Hugh Heftner/playboy type-- into marrying one of his three girlfriends. Which? It didn't matter. They'd get Greer --who was a wedding planner--to plan three separate wedding then the day of the wedding Daddy Dearest would pick one of the triplets he was dating and marry her. Asher would of course be made the best man and help plan the wedding so Greer would be forced to talk to him.

More bribing and he got her to agree to plan the weddings and spend time teaching him how to "seduce women" in exchange for signing over his rights to their child (her idea). *sigh, yall, sigh*

And so a ridiculous trio of over the top weddings are planned pitting the three bimbo twins against each other, Greer--who was a virgin the first time they had sex--starts giving him lessons on seduction since he was so bad (hello, again HE WAS SHITFACED WASTED) their first time by using print out sheets on how to kiss, he apologizes like a gagillion times for being an asshole that first time they were together when he'd been sloppy drunk, she continues to call it HER child and debate if he deserves to be in the child's life, everyone's secrets are found out and she decides the only way she'll know if he really loves her is to bring in his ex girlfriend--who had betrayed him and nearly destroyed his company by giving out insider information and sent him into the tailspin of drunkness that got them in the whole mess-- into the picture to make sure he's not still in love with the ex and really loves her. *hangs head*

I just. I can't. While I usually love Clare's writing and adore her Billionaires and Playboys and the different interconnected series that they inhabit this one was just an absolute miss and felt so incredibly out of place compared to all of the others. Others seem to be loving it but I can't recommend it at all. I do recommend the series as a whole as well as the Billionaire Boys Club series. The other books have all been excellent. This one had a halfway decent hero and some hot phone sex but other than that not much I could root for or a romance/love I really believed when I flipped the last page.

Greer has always been there for Asher, but she wishes she could break through her shyness and show how much she truly loves him. But after a steamy, mindless fling at Hunter and Gretchen’s engagement party, Greer finds herself tossed aside and forced to admit that you can’t love someone who doesn’t acknowledge you exist.

It’s a shame he got her pregnant.

After his fiancée betrayed him and tanked his business in one fell swoop, Asher has spent his time trying to rebuild his wealth and forget the past. But he doesn’t understand why Greer blew him off after their night together—until he catches a glimpse of her belly.

Now Asher is willing to do whatever it takes to convince Greer she belongs with him. And he’s very skilled at the art of persuasion.

*covers link to Amazon

Challenges: Pick Your Genre (contemporary) | Pervy Girl (phone sex/outdoors) | Goodreads

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